Anger Management Blog
Previous Posts
- Anger and Forgiveness Pt 1 - Types of Forgivenss
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 6 - How ...
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 5 - Reve...
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 4 - More...
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 3 - Empa...
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 2 - Ide...
- Teaching Anger Management to Children Pt. 1 - Mod...
- How Anger Can be Positive
- Does Christian Bale need Anger Management?
- Anger is a Protective Response
Anger Management
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Anger and Forgiveness Pt 2 - Who isthe One Freed by Forgiveness
The first person that forgiveness changes is the one doing the forgiving, not the one being forgiven.
How’s that? People often think of their anger as a way of keeping the one who hurt them in a kind of emotional prison. As long as they held onto the anger and bitterness, the wrongdoer stays in jail. But when you really stop and think about it, the only one who is really in an emotional prison is you. More often than not, the person you are pissed at is either unaware, doesn’t care or simply don’t give it as much thought as you. Meanwhile, you walk around stewing and obsessing over the wrong that was done to you. Your anger ends up affecting you more than the one who hurt you.
Forgiveness is the key to unlocking the prison door. There is not some automatic “click” that sets you free. You must choose to walk out of that cell. Some have lived with the label of “victim” for so long that it’s become part of them. They’d rather live in the cell because at least they know what to expect there. Forgiveness requires you to step outside and into the future.
How’s that? People often think of their anger as a way of keeping the one who hurt them in a kind of emotional prison. As long as they held onto the anger and bitterness, the wrongdoer stays in jail. But when you really stop and think about it, the only one who is really in an emotional prison is you. More often than not, the person you are pissed at is either unaware, doesn’t care or simply don’t give it as much thought as you. Meanwhile, you walk around stewing and obsessing over the wrong that was done to you. Your anger ends up affecting you more than the one who hurt you.
Forgiveness is the key to unlocking the prison door. There is not some automatic “click” that sets you free. You must choose to walk out of that cell. Some have lived with the label of “victim” for so long that it’s become part of them. They’d rather live in the cell because at least they know what to expect there. Forgiveness requires you to step outside and into the future.
Anger management advice by Dr. Joe James at 4:17 PM
